to do or not...the n'BAM! Hypothesis

Technically this post is two days old...but since I was influenced by America's Chauvinism ...it took precedence to completing this entry...
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People!

Life is funny at times...in fact many a times... there are many instances wherein people are challenged to take a split second decision or decisions that need deep thought process ... any decision taken has positive and/or negative implications...outweighing the benefits over the costs or even very art of balancing these...is the constant struggle of life...and probably every person in the world goes through...

This process becomes very complicated by the social structure and the values/morals that the person is inflicted upon. Inflicted..because it is not out of choice that a person is born and is brought up in a milieu under his/her control... as as economists say..endowments matter in every life...and where they go or otherwise depends on this endowments... of course there are people make it in spite of these endowments...but at the end of the day...if you look at the "balance sheet"... you can evaluate the cost of reaching a particular point.

Now this entry is particularly interesting to those who come from India and were born and bought up by parents whose decision made a significant role in the personal life...predominantly the parents with decent educational background and have taken every ounce of interest in the child's career...this is not to judge good or bad...but it is just a superficial analysis of the struggles that Indian youth and young adults face...

From the day of conception the parents make every decision for the children... which dress to wear, which food to eat, which toys he/she gets, what is best and otherwise...what school they will go and which specializations they will get into. Right from day one...till the children attain around 30 (hypothetically, since the decision making really never ends...) Now anything between these 3 decades are under unilateral control of the parents...the quantum education they get...and what quality of education to get...what kind of jobs...and of course the course of marriage..which changes the "grip" parents on children...many of the parents feel that their responsibility technically is fulfilled once the child is married and in a "good" family...from then onwards their supervision remains...although control diminishes.

Now...there is nothing wrong in doing so...it has been a tradition that has existed for generations and has worked till date...and probably will work in future...but seldom do parents realize the cost of this decision making on their children...they always think that whatever they decide is in the best interest of the child. Yes, it is true, but what about the aspirations of the children? do they have any aspirations? or are their aspirations take a back seat to that of the parents? do the children have exposure to what the real world consists of? what kind of educational, skill sets and other opportunities are available? or the children simply follow orders as in the defense field?

It is very often observed that the parents always want to see their children in their own profession....this is predominant in the fields of medicine, bureaucracy, business, army/defense fields. In other professions it varies...but the bottom line remains the same...if the child in the profession they are aware of or the majority of the people are...they might find support groups and or can be comfortable in advising. Once the parent my class mate remarked that the son of engineer should become an engineer and the son of a clerk should also become an engineer...(don't know what will happen to the profession of clerks...not that it is degrading or otherwise) But each an every profession has its own charm...certain professions can be well paying and certain not...certain can have challenges on a daily basis...and certain be as monotonous as they can get...this does not degrade any profession from other...and low paying does not mean it is not worthy...it is just a different profession that does not pay as much as others...in this aspect...the Americans are matured and understand that there are these different fields they they can fit into.

The problem in India is that there is over supply of people in various professions and hence leading to the demand-supply imbalance resulting in lower wages in certain fields. There is also the problem of every one attaining higher education/or degrees that are beyond the college degree. Perhaps this is not needed but this has led lead to over supply of highly educated personnel in fields that does not require that level of competency. But, given a choice or an evaluation criterion, person with higher education always takes precedence. This has led to a situation wherein people holding Masters degree in Arts are settling for clerical jobs although the job requirements is a high school degree with some skills like basic computer/type writing/ short hand etc.

This situation is not created by a single person or generation, competition has made it impossible for people with mediocre education and skill sets to attain a decent wage. In this era of competition, most of the parents saw technical education as an opportunity for better life and hence engineering became one of the predominant field in the southern part of India. North India is trying to grappling with this but is still into fields such as art, business, political sciences and economics. This is leading to a polarization of skill sets and so the job opportunities.

In this chaos, the child, whose main objective is to face the world is really not prepared to do s0. The child is never given an option to explore the opportunities on his/her own. This is leading to a filtering process, which I would like to term as Next Best Alternative Mismatch Hypothesis (n'BAM!!! as pronounced in Bam! as if hit by something!), wherein the child tries for the best...in the direction the parents decide...if he/she is successful, nothing like it, else he/she has to settle for the second best and again if he/she fails there he/she looks at the next best...and this vicious cycle assumes a temporary halt not until he/she is accepted in an institution and he/she takes up the profession suitable to that. the halt is temporary because the n"BAM again starts at this alternative. The mismatch always occurs because the goal and the end result are different.

If a person at say mid 30's is asked to confess about whether he/she wanted to be in the profession, they would say probably no! (some may say yes, these are the blessed people... no pun intended). This series of errors or lost opportunities is creating a society that probably is not really happy. I do not want to state that everyone is unhappy, but there are many people who are not happy with the opportunity at hand. They are at a stage in which they can not undo what was done long back and are unable to get out of the vicious cycle. Many compromise and live relatively happily ...but deep down they have a sense of regret that they could not achieve that set goal at one point or other. Of course not every one achieves the set goals and ambitions they start with...but there are many that make the cut.

This concept of "interest" decided by parents is causing more harm to the child than really helping him/her. There is a need to reverse this cycle...it does not mean parents leave all decisions to the children (in which case the child might stray away) but to let the children make an informed decision. This informed decision making is one of the most important foundations for self confidence in the child's or the young persons life. The child should be made aware of the likely consequences of choosing a particular direction in life...what are the pros and cons involved and then let the child make his/her own decision. This does not guarantee that the child will succeed in everything he/she takes up. But at least, the child has consciously taken that decision and he/she has to face the externalities associated with the same. He/she is not in a position to blame the parents or circumstances leading to where he stands later in his/her life.

The other major flaw with the parents is their sheep mentality. If the parent's colleague's child is in a certain profession and the child is doing great, they get influenced by them and envisage a career for their own children in that particular profession. Whether the child has the required skill sets for the same? or he/she has the capability to achieve it? whether the child is interested in that profession and or does he/she even have a say?...is of no concern to the parent. The parents decide that "this" would one day make their son/daughter happy...

I also suppose that they try to find opportunities that themselves lost in their childhood in their next generation. I am not a psychologist, but think that it is in every parents mind, that their children should achieve somethings they could not achieve. Undoubtedly the parents always wish their children are better than them at any given point of life.

This kind of parental control on the lives of their children leads to a constant struggle in their children. They are always divided as to which way to go.... which profession to take up: the ones they feel that they are interested in or as decided by the parents? the kind of spouse they envisage as best or their parents preference? the kind of job they are really interested in or the jobs in which their parents think that the child will be comfortable in? (they feel that a particular direction is good for their children since it worked for others)

This constant struggle takes a toll on the child. He/she feels that he has done something wrong or disrespectful to his elders if he follows his heart/conscience and rejects his/her parents direction. If he/she follows his/her parents advice, then he/she is unaswerable to his consciousness. Torn in this constant struggle...he/she becomes a part of what I've termed as the n'BAM! hypothesis. He/she is always trying to cope with his/her decision(s) and the decision(s) made by others for him/her. The children are neither winners nor losers...they are always stuck in between. They can not claim that their achievements are their own, nor can they claim that their failures are a result of their parents. This remains a great mystery in an average educated Indian's life ...the solution for the same is not readily available...but then every one avoids this very point and goes in the mode of denial. Yes, if you don't see it, it doesn't exist and everyone chooses not to see it and leads (or pretends to lead) a happy and contended life forever.

Okay, it is far beyond the time...but I presume I finished what I started to accomplish in this post

To the Parents!!!!

Avadhani

american chauvinism

Hey,

I have always wanted to write about this topic...but was always worried about the political correctness of the same and "bitching" about the country I am currently living...but..then I gave away these apprehensions to the right to express myself....in a free and a fair world.

The hegemony of America over the world need not be reemphasized...it has always portrayed itself as a messiah of world and a self proclaimed world leader. I have no clue how can a country do so? the people think that they are the greatest living creatures in this world....and that every other human being is inferior to them...be it economic, strategic or as a matter of fact being humans themselves. They have this conception that they are the "best" and there is nothing that can stop them...agreed that they are better in certain aspects of life...for instance their economy is far better than many other economies in the world, their military has the most advanced technologies (and probably the biggest) and they have good scientific research (let me not get to the fact that at least a fourth of the top contributors might not be US citizens at all)...these matters apart...what makes the country think that it is the best...of course...there can be patriots who really feel great about their country...there is no harm in it...and in fact..that is very important...to stand for their country...there are many people in the world who do not and or are not really proud of their nation and keep on complaining about their nation...in private and public...

Patriotism is important...but there is an invisible line between patriotism and chauvinism...real patriots proclaim that their country is the best...but do
acknowledge that other countries are equally good in their own respect...but when people cross over to chauvinism the recognition of other nation's greatness/strengths fails and this leads to conflicts...be it direct or indirect...

Every nation has its history and certain countries might be less or more sovereign than others...I emphasize sovereignty because it is entirely different from the term independence. Any nation, be it independent or otherwise...has a sovereign interest...a supreme national interest of development and welfare of people...that it defines by itself or is shaped by some "leaders/rulers" of the nation...at any given point...they do not surrender their right to govern to foreign nationals...no matter what the situation be. If it is independent...it is decided by their own nationals and if not...other nation's people decide...and hence the difference in the concept of national interest...

There are several aspects in which USA has gone beyond patriotism to chauvinism ...and it is reflected the way it has been conducting itself for the last century...it was not until the World Wars that America knew its power in the world...it was really contended by the way it was conducting its business within and with other nations. It was emerging as a sincere power in the world and investing in its nation and people...The world wars gave it the first opportunity to think big...and as a nation of greatest weapons manufacturer it traded weapons to both sides of the party (or at least part of both) and this was the best time for the US in terms of economy...they amassed huge reserves of currency and grew leaps and bounds. Bot their pride was first hit when Japan attacked Pearl harbor...and it retaliated by annihilating Hiroshima and Nagasaki. I might not be wrong in saying that the US is the only nation in the world that has used a nuclear weapon on other nation. I do not recall any other nation(s) in the world that have the nuclear capability doing so.

The world's so called super powers UK, formerly USSR, France, China and US were the only nations to possess nuclear war heads until around 1970s..when they came up with a brilliant "idea" of Non proliferation Treaty or NPT...to see that no other nation can develop similar nuclear capabilities...not that it was detrimental to the world as a whole...but to see that these nations enjoy their superiority over other nations... at least strategically...this is just one instance initiated by the US to retain world dominance...

There were several attempts headed by the US (or a chief party) wherein their superiority is protected intact...they created NATO, WTO (formerly GATT), the Bretton Woods Institutions, a number of Trade alliances that would benefit the US and many in which the treaties that are unequal and many others to name...including the one on climate change...the Kyoto pact...which...the US played a coyote role of leading every nation sign a pact on the emissions and it did not ratify its position and to date has not done so.

A critical analysis of every move that the US takes...is is the supreme self interest and it does not care the implications on other nations...an instance is the shipping out of manufacturing plants or BPOs to other nations...just to make pennies on the dollar...since the environmental regulations in the US become tougher and the companies could not comply with the same...they shipped their plants to nations which welcomed their decision at a cost to the environment and health of their own people...but for nations struggling to secure two square meals a day...any economic opportunity outweighs it negativity...The largest consumer of wood in the world...has its forests intact and imports lumber from the "third world" nations...the same is the case with oil and many other aspects including that of intellectual powers and competitive persons...some examples include the highly paid professors and researchers in the US who are not their nationals...but that have been given honorary citizenship to retain the intellectual superiority ...and the most funny of these are the athletes from various nations....to my surprise...many of the Olympic gold medalists (or Olympians) were not US nationalists by birth but were "absorbed" into the US once their talent was recognized...this is applicable to people of several facets of life...

Now this attitude has lead to a serious problem in their own nation...their over dependence on "other" people...and their success till date, has made them ignore their domestic problems ... which is growing by the day...I am not an expert to comment on this..but it is evident in the daily news coverage...or any good intellectual discussion...

As long as the nation thinks that it is great and that everything in the world can be "bought"...it is mistaken...and this itself will lead to the destruction of the perceived superiority in the world...

okay..today's time is up...

more later
Avadhani

politics..politics 2

Hmmm...

Two great days of the GOP convention and it is really making a dent...although the dems' might counter argue that there was no meat or there was too much red meat to chew...I thought that the 3rd day of convention really made a difference in the lackluster rep campaign ...all said and done...Sarah Palin did make a case for herself and McCain...and that is what exactly she was meant to do...

Coming down to issues...and the way political campaigns are run in the US...there is no comparison between India and the US...and Yes...the US counterpart is definitely far ahead...but here also everything is not about the real issues...but about who can speak better and convince the nation better...everything is at stake for the presidential nominees...and they have to perform or perish...

I somehow really feel as to how if this kind of moderated debates are held in India for elections? of course the best orators will win ..but it is not just about the oratory skills...but taking a stance on issues and sticking to it...coming up with a clear road map as to how and when they are going to deliver the goods...all we have are the assembly or parliamentary debates before major bills...and even before the bill is tabled the votes are worked out...

every politician in India seems to promise the "holy grail" every time to every one and the opposition offering the home delivery of the holy grail...and how they are going to do it...how are they really planning to fund the programs and where the money will come from...no one knows...yes there is the central government for the states and the BANKs for the central governments...but how much debt will the state...nation or as a matter of fact India has around 15% of its GDP in external Debt..which is a serious issue...not withstanding the domestic indebtedness of around 60% of GDP (do not quote me on the numbers..but these are the approximations of the current scenario, end of 2007 period)...what does this mean?..this means that the government is borrowing 75% of all its expenditures and then there is this deficit budget....which is contributing to this too

any way...I am neither an expert on these matters not have done enough research on the same...but the bottom line is there is a source and a sink....we don't know where both are...so we have to really make it a point to know that..i'll try to do some research on that in the next post(s)....

any way...time for today is up...

more later
Avadhani

politics...politics

Hey!!!

Following through the elections in the US with Democratic National Convention just past week and the Republican National Convention currently going on...there seems to be no end to how low people can get in politics ...trying to get as personal as it can...and then there are the news channels milking news and creating and sensationalizing news ...every bit of it...even if there ain't any...repeatedly updating news from ground zero...where in there is little or no change really on ground...every channel speculating on the prospects...of the development...none bi-partisan ...

Every party is making their own point... and defending their own policies and attacking the opposition.... experience or lack thereof...and my best quote comes from my favorite TV show hosts...Stephen Colbert of the Comedy Central's talk show, Colbert Report, stated in his program on 29th August 2008 and I paraphrase in here...that Sarah Palin is being used as a cheap political ploy....but he goes on to say that this is historic and probably this is the "for the first time in America, a woman has reached the highest level of being used as a cheap political ploy"

allegations ...counter allegations... blames and refutations...all is fair in love and war...and then there are people who would rather vote to a particular person not that he/she believes in him...but that he/she does not like the other person...and crossing across party lines...has seen unprecedented levels...for instance the Vice Presidential candidate couple of election seasons ago from Democratic party is openly supporting the Republican candidate for the Presidency...and urging others to do so...from his own party (dems).

Looking at all these....if I dare draw comparison of the worlds' oldest democracy to the world's largest...there is little or no difference...every one "is the same...there is no change"...opportunists making the best of what ever they can... and always looking for a fumble from the opposition...

there is so much to write... and some impounding works to finish....so let me make it a series...and carry on this discussion tomorrow...

chao
Avadhani

Support HOPE

Three Years....well spent or wasted?

Hey...myself?

September 1, 2008....it is exactly 3 years that I landed in the US...Now, is the time for introspection...

What have I learned in these three years? what have I really gained? have I gained anything at all? or it was just a waste of the 1000 days...

I have definitely learned many things in here...

1. People any where in the world are same...their mentalities and attitudes....every aspect...although there might be a slight degree of tolerance or lack there of in some

2. Education systems in here are well equipped and make the students more thorough in their subject..they encourage critical thinking....for sure...

3. There is a lot of hype and exaggeration in every aspect of life

4. Politicians are concerned at short term gains and safeguarding their seat for another term...

5. Many a times, I feel that style takes over substance and genuine talent or the real people are not recognized

6. America is not a land of opportunities for every one...but sure..it is for many...

7. The presidential election system here is one of the worlds best, but people are irrational and too narrow minded in approach....thus making the process a big farce

8. There is a very systematic approach to anything undertaken...and the both the process and the product are given equal importance

9. Like in many countries, critical issues are chosen to be ignored or postponed till the "opportune" moment comes...and when the the "opportune" moment arrives...no one is sure

10. the people and communities in certain places are really tolerant...and in certain are not...

11. Race is still a major factor in decisions

12. Merit is recognized, but "other" considerations are also taken int account

13. Every American knows the value of their hard earned money and are not shy to be pompous if required...

14. The diverse populace of the country gives rise to diverse interests, tastes, values and appreciation of different cultures

15. Sex plays a significant role in everyone's life.

16. many are opinionated

17. I have a better understanding of the world today

18. poverty still exists and the government chooses to be it that way

19. research and publications are a big thing here and every one writes something...on any subject there are tons of books and there are books on books too...hehe

20. Transportation systems are a real mess (I mean public)


Opportunities lost?
1. India has gone leaps and bounds in the last 3 years...it has strengthened its position in the globe and have definitely put its foot forward in many issues

2. Urban India still does not get the deserved attention

3. salaries in India are on the rise...but so is the rich-poor gap

4. employment and economic development are still major challenges...beyond the basic health....but to my knowledge, urban sector is far better than rural sector ...wherein the majority of people live...

5. there is still a lack of holistic perspective in tackling issues...

6. politicians seems to make promises...that they are not able to keep up or choose not to (as usual)

7. the cost of living in metro cities is insane and makes no rational arguments

8. has quality of life improved? yes... n ...no

9. remittances have substantially gone up...yeah....good for India..but at the same time...this has contributed to the divide...

10. the government "control" over each and every issue...still continues and hence the delays in processes and little or no outcomes...

11. film stars have started blogging!!! and AB makes it a point that he refutes each and every criticism aimed at him...way to go...Big B...but don't get mired in this (Virtual) world..he he...

12. the role of "left" parties is growing and so are the problems associated ... I am not against "left" per se...but they can't have their cake and eat it too...

okay..let me stop here...remembered the one hour limit...and it is way beyond that...

more later

Avadhani

ps: All things considered, India, is still better than America...no offense